I'm back in Birmingham at the moment, and this morning, I told my parents my plans for dropping out of university.
It didn't go well.
I was having breakfast with my brother when my dad came down. He kept asking how uni was and I was too afraid to tell him the truth so I said stuff like 'Yeah, it's been good'. When he asked me more and more questions, I just had to come out with the truth. He didn't take it so well. I thought he'd be understanding, and be cool with it. Boy was I wrong. Not only did he tell me I chose the wrong decision, but he said he wasn't gonna give me money and that I need to look after myself. My feelings? Surprised. Upset. Confused. But I quickly accepted the fact. My mom came down not long after, and asked my dad and I what we were arguing about. My dad told my mom what happened and walked out of the kitchen. My mom immediately shouted and said some things. It all happened so quickly that I couldn't put up a decent argument and explain what my plans were and stuff. I think it was because of this that my parents lost faith in me. My mom said she wouldn't support me financially either.
I ran into my room, well, my brother's room, and laid down in my bed for a bit. After calming down, I messaged some people about what happened. My cousins have been very supportive of me, offering me to stay with them. They said they would help me get a job and everything. I think that's the best choice for me at this time, moving in with them until I can support myself properly. I want to do this as soon as possible which means I probably have less than a month left living in Manchester. It's going to be sad leaving all the new friends I've made but it's for the best.
To my coursemates who have been messaging me asking if I'm alright and where I am, sorry for ignoring your messages. To be honest, I felt quite ashamed of dropping out of university and that's why I didn't make any contact with you guys. I just wanna take this chance to apologise, and I'll apologise again when I see you guys for the final time, and thanks for putting up with me.
To everyone who has given me encouragement and support, thank you to you too. I always feel better knowing someone out there cares.
Also to my brother, who disagreed with me dropping out but has give me all the support he can regardless, thanks a ton. He understands my mom and offered to get one of his friends' mom to talk to my mom and she only really listens to her friends. I know my brother will always be there for me when I'm down, even if he shows it in the worst way possible. I'm really proud of him and sometimes, I feel like the little brother who relies on him. I've used the last bit of money in my bank to buy him a limited edition 3DS XL.
SO YEAH...
That's my story so far. Thanks for being bothered to read this. Also, this is gonna be the last post in this blog. I may start another one, but who knows?
- stripeytofu
PS: This song describes how I feel at the moment. Knowing that my parents won't support me just makes me wanna prove them wrong! I'd really appreciate it if you could take the time to listen to the lyrics.
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